To My Husband on Father’s Day

You have been my rock, there from the very beginning.

You held this family together through the worst tragedy imaginable. While I completely fell apart, struggled to exist, and retreated into myself, you remained standing. You were there for the kids, making the calls, making the plans, and carrying burdens that no parent should ever have to bear.

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry I couldn’t do it.

And I’m grateful that you could.

I will spend the rest of my days being thankful for your strength during the moments when I had none left to give. I hate that this is our life now, that our faith has been tested in such a painful and unimaginable way.

I also feel that when a child dies, fathers are often forgotten.

Maybe it’s because society assumes men are strong and don’t need the same love, support, and comfort that mothers need. But what people don’t see are the tears shed in the shower, in the car, or in the quiet of our bedroom when you think no one is listening. They don’t see the moments when it finally feels safe to release the devastation and heartbreak that you’ve worked so hard to hold inside.

As a society, we need to do better.

Dads cry too.

Real men shed tears.

They loved, they lost, and they grieve their children just as deeply. We need to do a better job of recognizing that grief has no gender. We need to normalize the healthy expression of emotions and stop treating tears as a sign of weakness when, in reality, they are often a sign of tremendous strength.

We are all human, perfectly made by God.

We cry because we love.

We cry because we grieve.

And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

To all the dads out there trying to hold it together while carrying a broken heart, I see you. I love you. And I am praying for you.

Happy Father’s Day.

Just like mothers, you are still fathers, even if your child is no longer walking this earth but instead dancing among the angels, waiting for the day you will hold them once again in your loving, fatherly arms.

And to my husband, thank you.

Thank you for your strength, your faith, your love, and your devotion to our family. Thank you for carrying us when I couldn’t carry myself.

I love you so much.

You deserve the very best Father’s Day.

Forever and always, thank you.